How To Crew On A Sailboat and Avoid A Sunshine Enema?

Hello Mr Lord Hemorrhoid, where IS your neighbor's sailboat? I have been invited to crew on a sailboat heading around the middle east and into Africa, I have pedaled 900km in 7 days plus 2 ferry boats to reach the yacht on Langkawi Island. I was told to hurry. As I stand there next to the yacht owner, I realize I am getting blown off and shoved off without explanation to the neighbor. I do believe someone may have blown sunshine up my ass about this crewing thing, a sunshine enema of sorts that has the personnel growth potential of a inflamed hemorrhoid. Mr Lord Hemorrhoid the boat owner and captain has labeled his group the spirit sailors and they are looking for eclectic/good people to join them and have e-mailed me several times this month about crewing with them. The “spirit sailor” apparently loves the website blah, blah, blah.

As I process the fact that I have now pedaled onto an Island and my plans have been canceled, my behind begins to glow with the stench of a sunshine enema; the sunlight is indeed so bright I radiate effortlessly over to the neighbor’s yacht. He is looking for someone to yacht sit for a few days. The following day, I find out that Mr. Lord Hemorrhoid the spirit sailor didn’t like the looks of me on our first 3 minute meeting. You see, I arrived for the first meeting by bicycle in the pouring rain, I was wet, go figure. Apparently, the silly sailor, Mr. Lord Hemorrhoid flared up and decided he doesn’t like solo female cyclists arriving wet to his sailboat. As the comic irony of Mr. Lord Hemorrhoid the spirit sailor who doesn’t like to get wet sinks in Pandemic The Magic Bicycle is drenched in oil battling the salty air on the neighbors yacht and I am coordinated the pedaling for pennies Be The Adventure Africa T-shirt Project and sorting out my route through the middle east into Africa.

Another one of my favorite hemorrhoids

How to Crew on a Sailboat and Avoid A Sunshine Enema?

Find A Crew is a website dedicated to matching people up. I have met many legitimate, wonderful people who have found crew and boats to crew on through the site. The majority of the yachts, when I sailed from Australia to Indonesia found crew through the site, but as stated above there are a few Mr. Lord Hemorrhoids out there as well.

Skalatitude..."When humans and nature are living in harmony there is magic and beauty everywhere"
back to top