The Thieving Lunatic and the LED Lights

This photo is not of my dell notebook laptop because my computer was too embarassed by it's conditon to show up for the photo!

THE THIEVVING LUNATIC AND THE LED LIGHTS
As I glare through a spiders maze of flashing LED computer screen shrapnel I wonder how much longer this laptop screen will last. Pandemic The Clumsy Bicycle has a small habit of falling on top of laptops. The pot holes are also masterminding with the dirt road to fearlessly spread the spider’s maze of cracked LED lights on the screen at an alarming rate.

Fast Forward 2 days

I am arriving back at the family run guest house to get Pandemic The Magic Bicycle and head out for the day. I roll the pannier closed and realize there is way too much room in my tiny bike bag. The laptop is missing. My immediate thoughts are well this sucks, at least it was a pleasant robbery, there is always pen and paper, how quickly I am slimming down in Indonesia and the final thought because I have always enjoyed lemonade, wow, will I be fast now, that is a lot of weight to not pedal.

Fast Forward 20 Minutes

I am sitting in the hotel office, the laptop is on the desk, it will not open programs, the screen is blank. The staff has just "found" my laptop. I told them it had been stolen by someone with a key because the door had been dead bolted, I was very hesitant to tell them who I thought the thief was but my instincts were about to knock me over so I told them it was the man with the broom.

30 Minutes Later

I am reading a note they have brought me in English that says I am very sorry for my friend he cannot talk. There is a lot of talk about the polisis because originally I said out loud to myself that maybe I should I call the police. I am now saying in Bahasa Indonesian, Tidak Polisis, which is no police, and then embelish it with fix computer, make work, repair. I quickly realize that the polisis were not the people who were going to get my laptop working and get the hard drive back.

Also, from the look in their eye I don’t think I want to sick the notoriously strict indo police on these nice people who are trying to make it right and have "found" my laptop. No polisis, fix computer, make work, repair! I figured one of those English words might be understood. One great thing about cruising on a bicycle is all the reading time of all the store front posters. All in Indonesian mixed with a few known English words like repair. For instance the car garage sign says Motro Repair means, motor repair shop.

The laptop screen is completely wiped clean and I convinced that the software pirate thief has wiped out my hard drive is hacking into every password, has stole my software and every risqu’e photo that has ever been taken of me will be on Indonesia Facebook within 5 minutes. All they are saying is my friend, no talk! I am thinking of American rights to remain silence until an attorney is present etc. These folks might craftier then I had thought.

I say can we please ask him, the man who took it, what he did so we can fix it because it worked before he took it. There are now 6 people and myself and the laptop. The man who took it then gave it back after the staff went looking would not come into the office, the crowd said Tidak, no, he in Manado (700kn away), no talk. I laughed knowing that that was either a complete lie or a language barrier. Fix computer, make work, repair. The woman in the office says my baby inglis, which is the word for English, she gestures the round pregnancy sign and leaves. She is either having a baby or going to get her daughter.

She returns in 5 minutes with her English speaking university student daughter to translate. Turns out they really don’t want me to call the police because the man who stole the computer then gave it back can’t speak, is non-verbal, disabled and that he didn’t do anything to the computer because he doesn’t know anything about them and they are very sorry for their friend. So much for the hacker theories, I think to myself. Someone says he put it in a wet area, I start to laugh because most electronics no matter what language the manual is in will say in English do not put in wet area. I suddenly realized that their friend probably pushed on the interesting spider’s maze pattern on the screen and it was now completely defunct.

Fast forward until the end of the day at the Guest House

The disabled man is sorry, the women is sorry for her friend, the women’s daughter still thinks my laptop was put in a wet area, the indo police are corrupt and Pandemic The Magic Clumbsy Bicycle is grateful to not be responsible for finally doing the laptop in. And me, well, until I can get it repaired, I'll be a pen and paper girl.